Are you cool or funny? What does it take to be likeable?

I asked my daughter if I was funny. She said yes. I asked how funny? She said “medium”. “Can you write a joke for me and put it into the lunchbox for me?” I asked if she wanted a medium funny joke. She said yes. Ten minutes later, she said she didn’t want it. I asked if she didn’t think I was funny any more. She said, “you’re still medium funny but I just don’t want a joke.”

She is 8 right now. So, she finds me amusing. I am sure by the time 13 hits, I will be a complete and utter embarrassment to her. Not funny, not cool and I think in her eyes my I.Q. will plummet. I am getting ready for it. Right now I just like to hear the answers.

I ask her a lot of questions and then say, “tell me more about that.” Trying to teach her a little bit about the Dale Carnegie system of how to be interesting by being Interested. She doesn’t really understand that right now.

I am trying to teach her about not having to compete with other people’s stories. This is called upping the ante. She doesn’t need to do that. We all want to do it because everyone’s favorite subject is about themselves. If you are the one asking the questions, you are the one in control of the conversation. No one likes a bragger. Well, maybe it’s just me. I don’t like a bragger but I understand it is out of that persons need for significance and connection so I play with it and acknowledge the need by giving it to them. Likeability is huge in the marketplace. If people don’t like you, you are going to have a tough time. People don’t want to deal with you unless they have to deal with you.

Keys to being likeable
don’t lie
don’t be the smelly kid
don’t brag
don’t be a conversation hog
limit your complaining

OK, that’s enough of what not to do
Here’s what to do
Be genuine
Be nice
Be a good listener
Ask people about themselves
Be generous
Be thankful

By the way, her dad is also medium funny, so we are in good company. I find him medium funny as well *but I think I am more funny than his medium funny.


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